[Java] Investigate dependency on Netty internals in arrow-memory-netty

### Describe the enhancement requested

See discussion in apache/arrow#36211.

Ideally we'd be able to remove the usage of internals, or at least make it so that they're optional (e.g. if we could implement two versions of InnerAllocator and pick the one that works at runtime).

### Component(s)

Java

從 arrow-memory-netty 元件開始，閱讀 apache/arrow#36211 中的討論。追蹤其對 Netty 內部實作的相依性，並判斷是否可以在執行階段移除該用法或將其設為選用。當相依性被移除或建立了議定的選用實作時，即視為完成。

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