`libfabric=1.17.0-3` on Debian causes MPI tests to fail with `MPI_ERR_OTHER`

Sample CI failure:
https://gitlab.tiker.net/inducer/meshmode/-/jobs/533461

Similar failure in grudge:
https://gitlab.tiker.net/inducer/grudge/-/jobs/533485

Sample traceback:
```
Traceback (most recent call last):
File "", line 198, in _run_module_as_main
File "", line 88, in _run_code
File "/var/lib/gitlab-runner/builds/VFPjm48d/0/inducer/meshmode/.env/lib/python3.11/site-packages/mpi4py/run.py", line 208, in
main()
File "/var/lib/gitlab-runner/builds/VFPjm48d/0/inducer/meshmode/.env/lib/python3.11/site-packages/mpi4py/run.py", line 198, in main
run_command_line(args)
File "/var/lib/gitlab-runner/builds/VFPjm48d/0/inducer/meshmode/.env/lib/python3.11/site-packages/mpi4py/run.py", line 47, in run_command_line
run_path(sys.argv[0], run_name='__main__')
File "", line 291, in run_path
File "", line 98, in _run_module_code
File "", line 88, in _run_code
File "/var/lib/gitlab-runner/builds/VFPjm48d/0/inducer/meshmode/test/test_partition.py", line 609, in
_test_mpi_boundary_swap(dim, order, num_groups)
File "/var/lib/gitlab-runner/builds/VFPjm48d/0/inducer/meshmode/test/test_partition.py", line 426, in _test_mpi_boundary_swap
conns = bdry_setup_helper.complete_some()
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
File "/var/lib/gitlab-runner/builds/VFPjm48d/0/inducer/meshmode/meshmode/distributed.py", line 332, in complete_some
data = [self._internal_mpi_comm.recv(status=status)]
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
File "mpi4py/MPI/Comm.pyx", line 1438, in mpi4py.MPI.Comm.recv
File "mpi4py/MPI/msgpickle.pxi", line 341, in mpi4py.MPI.PyMPI_recv
File "mpi4py/MPI/msgpickle.pxi", line 303, in mpi4py.MPI.PyMPI_recv_match
mpi4py.MPI.Exception: MPI_ERR_OTHER: known error not in list
```
Downgrading to libfabric (see [here](https://github.com/illinois-scicomp/machine-shop-maintenance/commit/f42ef5f708c9de7dff28b022407ffe2da4b32aba)) appears to resolve this.

[This](https://github.com/mpi4py/mpi4py/blob/a7610e53b78841e1a607005d5b3ace7b9315f45b/src/mpi4py/MPI/msgpickle.pxi#L286-L306) is the code in mpi4py that ultimately fails, it's a matched receive (`mrecv`).

@majosm Got any ideas? (Pinging you since the two of us last touched this code.)