Pooled threat: safe merging not working properly

There have been multiple, almost concurrent reports of and PRs for errors with safe merging recently:

Closed:
- #3611
- #3694

Open:
- #3681
- #3682
- #3689
- #3691
- #3695
- #3705
- #3706

Thanks @Robertboy18, @yupengtang, @DaoyuanLi2816, and @mohansree14 for reporting those and working on them. The problem is that we're getting overwhelmed with PRs and thus have bring in some order, which includes pooling PRs that address very similar issues.

Affected PEFT methods that are not yet fixed are:

- [ ] BOFT Conv2d
- [ ] AdaMSS
- [ ] RoAd
- [ ] LoRA + bnb

Let me know if I missed something.

Instead of dealing with those one (or multiple) PRs at a time, I would like to see a single PR fixing all of those at once. This includes one/multiple unit test that check all affected PEFT methods and can catch future PEFT methods with the same issue, instead of having one test per PEFT method.

I will thus close all open PRs and assign this task to one person, in order of submission of the open tasks. So if I'm not missing something, this person would be @yupengtang. If you don't reply within one week or if you don't want/can't work on this task, I'll assign the next person in order of priority.

If your contribution is closed and you're not assigned, please know that your work is still appreciated.