"Error: 14 UNAVAILABLE: Stream refused by server" caused by disconnect by server without grpc client knowing

Continuation of https://github.com/grpc/grpc-node/issues/1969

I pushed a sample client/server pair to this repo: https://github.com/thegleb/grpc-debug.

It appears the condition is triggered for us when the server responds with an extremely long error message. From there it seems like the http2 client potentially responds with a GOAWAY and error code 9, after which the connection is closed on the server side but the grpc client is never notified, leading to a pattern of 1) `DEADLINE_EXCEEDED` error and 2) `UNAVAILABLE: Stream refused by server` for any additional requests queued on the channel.

The expected output of the default test case looks like this.

##### Actual (default test case, broken behavior)

Server logs (exception is 100,000 characters long)

```
2681 [nioEventLoopGroup-3-1] DEBUG io.grpc.netty.NettyServerHandler - [id: 0xb71ae346, L:/0:0:0:0:0:0:0:1:50051 - R:/0:0:0:0:0:0:0:1:51853] OUTBOUND HEADERS: streamId=1 headers=GrpcHttp2OutboundHeaders[:status: 200, content-type: application/grpc, grpc-status: 2, grpc-message: Aliquam euismod id odio quis commodo.

2703 [nioEventLoopGroup-3-1] DEBUG io.grpc.netty.NettyServerHandler - [id: 0xb71ae346, L:/0:0:0:0:0:0:0:1:50051 - R:/0:0:0:0:0:0:0:1:51853] INBOUND GO_AWAY: lastStreamId=0 errorCode=9 length=0 bytes=
```

Client logs (long exception with 10 second timeout)

```
2022-01-27T02:16:56.648Z | call_stream | Starting stream on subchannel ::1:50051 with headers
grpc-timeout: 9968m
grpc-accept-encoding: identity,deflate,gzip
accept-encoding: identity,gzip
:authority: localhost:50051
user-agent: grpc-node-js/1.2.9
content-type: application/grpc
:method: POST
:path: /routeguide.RouteGuide/GetFeatureBad
te: trailers

2022-01-27T02:16:56.648Z | call_stream | [0] attachHttp2Stream from subchannel ::1:50051
2022-01-27T02:16:56.648Z | subchannel_refcount | ::1:50051 callRefcount 0 -> 1
2022-01-27T02:16:56.649Z | call_stream | [0] sending data chunk of length 22 (deferred)
2022-01-27T02:16:56.649Z | call_stream | [0] calling end() on HTTP/2 stream
2022-01-27T02:16:56.650Z | subchannel | 127.0.0.1:50051 CONNECTING -> READY
2022-01-27T02:17:06.614Z | call_stream | [0] cancelWithStatus code: 4 details: "Deadline exceeded"
2022-01-27T02:17:06.614Z | call_stream | [0] ended with status: code=4 details="Deadline exceeded"
2022-01-27T02:17:06.615Z | subchannel_refcount | ::1:50051 callRefcount 1 -> 0
2022-01-27T02:17:06.615Z | call_stream | [0] close http2 stream with code 8
Error: 4 DEADLINE_EXCEEDED: Deadline exceeded
```

##### Expected (behavior with shorter exception lengths)

Server logs (exception is 90,000 characters or less)

```
3328 [nioEventLoopGroup-3-1] DEBUG io.grpc.netty.NettyServerHandler - [id: 0x28b182aa, L:/0:0:0:0:0:0:0:1:50051 - R:/0:0:0:0:0:0:0:1:52227] OUTBOUND HEADERS: streamId=1 headers=GrpcHttp2OutboundHeaders[:status: 200, content-type: application/grpc, grpc-status: 2, grpc-message: Aliquam euismod id odio quis commodo.

3388 [nioEventLoopGroup-3-1] DEBUG io.grpc.netty.NettyServerHandler - [id: 0x28b182aa, L:/0:0:0:0:0:0:0:1:50051 - R:/0:0:0:0:0:0:0:1:52227] INBOUND RST_STREAM: streamId=1 errorCode=0
```

Client logs (normal length exception)

```
2022-01-27T02:29:46.217Z | call_stream | Starting stream on subchannel ::1:50051 with headers
grpc-timeout: 9965m
grpc-accept-encoding: identity,deflate,gzip
accept-encoding: identity,gzip
:authority: localhost:50051
user-agent: grpc-node-js/1.2.9
content-type: application/grpc
:method: POST
:path: /routeguide.RouteGuide/GetFeatureBad
te: trailers

2022-01-27T02:29:46.218Z | call_stream | [0] attachHttp2Stream from subchannel ::1:50051
2022-01-27T02:29:46.218Z | subchannel_refcount | ::1:50051 callRefcount 0 -> 1
2022-01-27T02:29:46.218Z | call_stream | [0] sending data chunk of length 22 (deferred)
2022-01-27T02:29:46.218Z | call_stream | [0] calling end() on HTTP/2 stream
2022-01-27T02:29:46.220Z | subchannel | 127.0.0.1:50051 CONNECTING -> READY
2022-01-27T02:29:46.402Z | call_stream | [0] Received server headers:
:status: 200
content-type: application/grpc
grpc-status: 2
grpc-message: Aliquam euismod id odio quis commodo. Mauris quis dolor mollis, tristique erat nec, accumsan urna.

2022-01-27T02:29:46.407Z | call_stream | [0] Received server trailers:
:status: 200
content-type: application/grpc
grpc-status: 2
grpc-message: Aliquam euismod id odio quis commodo. Mauris quis dolor mollis, tristique erat nec, accumsan urna.

2022-01-27T02:29:46.411Z | call_stream | [0] received status code 2 from server
2022-01-27T02:29:46.412Z | call_stream | [0] received status details string "Aliquam euismod id odio quis commodo. Mauris quis dolor mollis, tristique erat nec, accumsan urna. " from server
2022-01-27T02:29:46.414Z | call_stream | [0] ended with status: code=2 details="Aliquam euismod id odio quis commodo. Mauris quis dolor mollis, tristique erat nec, accumsan urna. "
2022-01-27T02:29:46.416Z | subchannel_refcount | ::1:50051 callRefcount 1 -> 0
2022-01-27T02:29:46.417Z | call_stream | [0] close http2 stream with code 8
Error: 2 UNKNOWN: Aliquam euismod id odio quis commodo. Mauris quis dolor mollis, tristique erat nec, accumsan urna.
at Object.callErrorFromStatus (/grpc-debug/node/node_modules/@grpc/grpc-js/build/src/call.js:31:26)
at Object.onReceiveStatus (/grpc-debug/node/node_modules/@grpc/grpc-js/build/src/client.js:176:52)
at Object.onReceiveStatus (/grpc-debug/node/node_modules/@grpc/grpc-js/build/src/client-interceptors.js:336:141)
at Object.onReceiveStatus (/grpc-debug/node/node_modules/@grpc/grpc-js/build/src/client-interceptors.js:299:181)
at /grpc-debug/node/node_modules/@grpc/grpc-js/build/src/call-stream.js:145:78
at processTicksAndRejections (internal/process/task_queues.js:77:11) {
code: 2,
details: 'Aliquam euismod id odio quis commodo. Mauris quis dolor mollis, tristique erat nec, accumsan urna. ',
metadata: Metadata {
internalRepr: Map(1) { 'content-type' => [Array] },
options: {}
}
}
Error: 2 UNKNOWN: Aliquam euismod id odio quis commodo. Mauris quis dolor mollis, tristique erat nec, accumsan urna.
at Object.callErrorFromStatus (/grpc-debug/node/node_modules/@grpc/grpc-js/build/src/call.js:31:26)
at Object.onReceiveStatus (/grpc-debug/node/node_modules/@grpc/grpc-js/build/src/client.js:176:52)
at Object.onReceiveStatus (/grpc-debug/node/node_modules/@grpc/grpc-js/build/src/client-interceptors.js:336:141)
at Object.onReceiveStatus (/grpc-debug/node/node_modules/@grpc/grpc-js/build/src/client-interceptors.js:299:181)
at /grpc-debug/node/node_modules/@grpc/grpc-js/build/src/call-stream.js:145:78
at processTicksAndRejections (internal/process/task_queues.js:77:11) {
code: 2,
details: 'Aliquam euismod id odio quis commodo. Mauris quis dolor mollis, tristique erat nec, accumsan urna. ',
metadata: Metadata {
internalRepr: Map(1) { 'content-type' => [Array] },
options: {}
}
}
2022-01-27T02:29:46.441Z | call_stream | [0] HTTP/2 stream closed with code 8
```

As far as I can tell this is likely happening outside grpc as the client does not appear to be notified, which is why I suspect http2 library involvement. Meanwhile, the server gets the GOAWAY signal and presumably closes the channel, making it unavailable and causing all the behaviors outlined in https://github.com/grpc/grpc-node/issues/1969.

Does this behavior make sense? What might trigger that `GO_AWAY` error code 9 response?