Notifications preferences too complicated

At the moment I don't think it is clear what the notification preferences mean to someone new to the system, or that they should have to set them at all, and the defaults are fail-bad, that is if they do nothing (and they don't know they have to) they get nothing.

1. I appreciate you are trying to think to the future when offering alternate notification types, but at the moment and for the foreseeable future, email is it. I think you should remove the notifications preferences and rephrase the options as "Notify me by email of new issues...". Currently if you ask for notifications you don't get any! You must also tick the email box. I think in the future you could replace the phrase "by email" with a pull down or something which offers alternatives, but at least gives you email as default.
2. I would like to add to the Notify me phrasing

o Notify me of new issues and when new threads are started (this means you would need to opt in to receive more emails about the thread after the first one)

o Notify me of new issues and automatically follow all new threads (you would then need to opt out to stop receiving all messages about the thread)

etc

The issue does not name files, tests, or entry points. Start by locating the notification-preferences interface and its handling of default selections, then compare the current behavior with the requested email and thread-following options; done means the preferences are understandable and new users receive the intended notifications without extra hidden steps.