[EKS] [request]: allow delete EKS cluster seamlessly upon request

### Community Note

* Please vote on this issue by adding a 👍 [reaction](https://blog.github.com/2016-03-10-add-reactions-to-pull-requests-issues-and-comments/) to the original issue to help the community and maintainers prioritize this request
* Please do not leave "+1" or "me too" comments, they generate extra noise for issue followers and do not help prioritize the request
* If you are interested in working on this issue or have submitted a pull request, please leave a comment

**Tell us about your request**
To allow to delete EKS cluster seamlessly upon request.

**Which service(s) is this request for?**
EKS

**Tell us about the problem you're trying to solve. What are you trying to do, and why is it hard?**
Hello.

We regularly (sometimes several times a week/a day) create and destroy grids with Terraform in AWS, this is done for various testing/debugging purposes. We have fully infrastructure as a code approach, and basically whole grid is cattle in a herd in our environment.

Since recent months, we started seeing this message often:
```
....module.eks_cluster.aws_security_group.eks-cluster: Still destroying... [id=sg-*********, 15m0s elapsed]....
....
Error: error deleting EKS Cluster (***-eks-cluster): ResourceInUseException: Cannot delete because cluster a***-eks-cluster currently has an update in progress
{
RespMetadata: {
StatusCode: 409,
RequestID: "746bb543-75f0-427b-b551-efb672c708be"
},
ClusterName: "***-eks-cluster",
Message_: "Cannot delete because cluster ***-eks-cluster currently has an update in progress"
}

```
(This is log fragment from Jenkins that runs Terraform destroy).

This persists for at least 2 attempts in Terraform, but after a while (hours) cluster can be deleted finally by running same pipeline again or in web console. These errors and manual intervention needed is annoying, though.

Last year we have seen no such errors, it started only very recently.

**Are you currently working around this issue?**
after a while (hours) cluster can be deleted finally by running same pipeline again. These errors and manual intervention needed is annoying, though.

**Additional context**
I think whenever one decided to delete EKS cluster, any transitional activities inside of cluster are no more a priority. That means, any cluster updates etc. should be stopped immediately, and the delete should proceed. Please explain reasons for refuse to delete EKS cluster upon request, if any.

**Attachments**
none at the moment

The report concerns EKS cluster deletion during Terraform destroy, with failures observed in Jenkins and eventual deletion through a later rerun or the AWS console. Start by investigating the EKS deletion API behavior when an update is in progress and compare it with the reported Terraform workflow; done means deletion no longer requires repeated attempts or manual intervention.

Written by the indexing model from the issue text.