RDS: cannot major-version upgrade Aurora cluster with custom instance parameter group

### Describe the bug

In order to do an in-place major version upgrade of Aurora, you need to set `dbInstanceParameterGroupName` on the cluster, not just on the individual instances. You cannot do this today.

### Expected Behavior

Aurora cluster would do a major version upgrade

### Current Behavior

On trying to upgrade the cluster:

```Error: The stack named XXXX failed to deploy: UPDATE_ROLLBACK_COMPLETE: Resource handler returned message: "The current DB instance parameter group XXXXX is custom. You must explicitly specify a new DB instance parameter group, either default or custom, for the engine version upgrade. ```

### Reproduction Steps

```
new DatabaseCluster(this, id, {
...
instanceProps: {
parameterGroup: ParameterGroup.fromParameterGroupName(this, `instance-parameter-group-15`, `${this.databaseName}-aurora15-custom-instance-parameter-group`),
},
parameterGroup: ParameterGroup.fromParameterGroupName(this, `cluster-parameter-group-15`, `${this.databaseName}-aurora15-custom-cluster-parameter-group`),
});
```

### Possible Solution

Workaround:
```
const cluster: CfnDBCluster = this.cluster.node.children.filter(x => x instanceof CfnDBCluster)[0] as CfnDBCluster;
cluster.dbInstanceParameterGroupName = `${this.databaseName}-aurora15-custom-instance-parameter-group`;
```

### Additional Information/Context

_No response_

### CDK CLI Version

2.61.1

### Framework Version

_No response_

### Node.js Version

20.1.0

### OS

macos

### Language

Typescript

### Language Version

_No response_

### Other information

_No response_

Start at the DatabaseCluster construct and inspect how instanceProps.parameterGroup and the cluster parameterGroup are synthesized into CfnDBCluster. Compare the generated resource with the workaround setting CfnDBCluster.dbInstanceParameterGroupName; done means a custom instance parameter group is emitted on the cluster so the Aurora major-version upgrade succeeds.

Written by the indexing model from the issue text.